English Toolkit

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9.1Sentence structure: Monotonous sentence structure
TYPICAL ERROR Roger Federer is from Switzerland. He is their most famous tennis player. Some people regard him as the greatest tennis player the world has ever seen.
CORRECTION Roger Federer, the most famous tennis player produced by Switzerland, is regarded by many people as the greatest tennis player the world has ever seen.

EXPLANATION If all our sentences are the same length and are structured in the same way (subject - verb - object, as in the typical error above) the audience will find them monotonous. Fluent writers combine simple sentences to make complex sentences, as in the sample correction. Such combining of simple sentences into complex sentences is called synthesis.

The best way to develop control of complex phrasing is to read. By reading, we are exposed to models. The more we read and listen, the more we are able to imitate the models ... and what we are imitating is the use of different sorts of phrases and clauses to make complex sentences.

Below are some models of synthesis illustrating how different sorts of phrases and clauses work.

Using a noun phrase in apposition to synthesise simple sentences (i.e. a noun phrase placed beside a noun)

  • SIMPLE SENTENCES: Ange Postecoglou was the coach of the Australian soccer team. He guided the team to victory in the Asian cup.
  • SYNTHESISED: Ange Postecoglou, the coach of the Australian soccer team, guided the team to victory in the Asian cup.

Using an adjectival clause to synthesise simple sentences

  • SIMPLE SENTENCES: Australia won the Asian cup. They had not won it before.
  • SYNTHESISED: Australia won the Asian cup, which they had not won before.

Synthesise (combine) the sentences in these sets so that each set ends up as one sentence. Do not use and. (Instead, use conjunctions such as although, because, if and when; relative pronouns such as who, that and which; and participial phrases and appositional phrases.)
aWhen a stockwhip is cracked, the tip of the whip exceeds the speed of sound causing a sharp is literally a sonic boom.
bIn 490 BC, a Greek soldier named Pheidippides ran from Marathon to he announced news of the defeat of the Persians.
cThe best time to view the Southern Lights is in winter (May to August) and during the spring is in September.
dThe Phoenicians were a great seafaring pioneered trade routes across the Mediterranean.
eWhen Alexander the Great was given Egypt by the Persians in 333 BC, he built a new capital called after himself.
f
Success!